Footwear and feet stuff

As soon as I decided to write about my issues with my feet and aging, I thought, "Oh no, here come the foot fetish guys." And if you don't know what I mean, just mention the word "bunion" or "toes" in a post on X, and almost invariably, you'll get some dude with an auto-follow asking "wyd" or something like this.

I'm not shaming anyone who's into that. I'm just saying that there's a time and a place, and this isn’t either one of them when I talk about my feet and what's happening to them now that I'm 50 years old.

Having worn very high heels for most of my 20s and then business office heels for the rest of the time, my poor feet have suffered. 😞 Of course, the other side of the coin is that walking in heels is ACTUALLY good for you! But I have developed bunions on both feet, particularly on my large toes, and they can be painful, especially during the cold winter months.

I went to see my podiatrist, Dr. Papson in East Lansing, and I highly recommend him. We discussed my options, and we are going to start with less invasive procedures first. This means I had to have orthotics made for my shoes. I don't mind them, but they also limit me in terms of what shoes I can wear.

I had to say goodbye to my Steve Madden pink sparkly heels - sad face.

Now, I usually wear flats in some form. However, I still have heels that I'll wear occasionally; I just have to accept that my feet will be sore the next day.

Gone are the days of not even caring about what I put on my feet or the consequences for the next day. I never thought I'd reach the point where I had to be mindful of my footwear.

Anyway, that's the story behind my #FridayFootwear hashtag. Shoes have become a daily consideration for me, and I'm trying to find a balance between sexy and comfortable. And no, I won't be posting any photos of my feet (see the post above! Haha) unless you pay me. (Just kidding.)

Take care,

H

Commissioned art work

I stumbled upon a post on Twitter recently featuring a captivating piece of artwork titled "On the blue-grey leather sofa" by Anders Zorn, 1916 (from a private collection).

In a light-hearted jest, I quipped that I'd be willing to pay someone to create a similar masterpiece for me. However, I'm well aware of the type of model I'd make for painters or artists, and it's not exactly a flattering portrayal.

Back in my twenties, I crossed paths with a gentleman, likely in his forties or fifties—although I'm notoriously bad at guessing ages. He was an artist, and a rather talented one at that. His livelihood came from his art, which ranged from individual paintings to entire murals adorning businesses around Lansing. I found it mesmerizing that someone could sustain themselves solely through their artistic endeavors.

Among his repertoire were surreal depictions of partially animalistic, naked women—not unlike the concept of the 80s show "Manimal," but with a modern twist. It was in this context that I found myself posing, if memory serves me right, as a leopard perched in a tree. However, my inability to remain still prompted the artist to opt for capturing my likeness through photographs rather than sketches (he said he would rather paint me from a photograph than real life). I consented without hesitation at the time, yet I never got to see the resulting portrait or the film from that photoshoot. (For the record, if you ever did catch a glimpse of it, no, you didn't.)

On another occasion, I volunteered at the local community center to pose as a 1920s flapper girl for a group of artists. I was fully clothed, mind you, and they even provided me with an extensive wardrobe to truly embody the era. Initially, it was a blast, but my restlessness soon kicked in. Despite their best efforts, the artists struggled to keep me still, prompting reminders and occasional breaks. My fidgeting and constant movement left me wishing for something—anything—to occupy myself, other than awkwardly making eye contact with those attempting to capture my likeness on canvas.

Here is a photo from that event, showcasing my then-blonde locks, for those who may have forgotten or never knew me during that phase.

In essence, I've come to the conclusion that lounging on a chaise and posing for an extended period isn't quite my forte. However, the notion of reclining in a sleeping pose and actually dozing off while someone paints or draws me awake... now, that's an idea worth considering.

Until next time,

-H

Book review(s) - REPOST

This post is reposted from 12/21/2014. I feel like this is when it started for me - the desire to share my story and feel like I am entitled to talk about my past. I came across this old draft and decided to rerun it. I hope you enjoy!

Last week, on the way to work, I was listening to the Moth podcast and one of the storytellers was Jillian Lauren. She was talking about the time in her life when she and her husband (the guy who is in the band Weezer, Scott Shriner) went to adopt their son from another country.
Her story was compelling to me, so I did some research online and found out she is a writer.

I have read both her novels in the span of less than a week. When that happens, it prompts me to write a review so here it goes.

Book 1: Some Girls

This one is a memoir, and it details her time as a girl in a harem (I know, I totally did not know those even existed any more).  Even more shocking is they come here, to America, and hire girls to go there (in this case "there" is Borneo).

So she is 18 years old and gets whisked away over to another country to be part of a harem for the Sultan of Brunei's youngest brother, Prince Jefri. She is told she will be paid $20,000 for two weeks of her time. This memoir discusses her life when she is over there, and how she is trying to find herself, but keeps getting lost along the way.

She was adopted and she has this fairy tale belief that her "real" mother was a ballerina who gave her up to pursue her career as a professional ballerina. This discusses her thoughts about that, and her relationship with her adoptive parents. She is strong-willed and jumps off the cliff so many times. It's about her mistakes and her vulnerabilities. She's very open about her life and that draws you in.

I like the detail she goes into, and I keep forgetting she's just 18/19 years old when all this is happening to her - she's a baby really. She did write while she was over there, to sort of pass the time by, and this ended up being helpful, I'm sure, when she decided to write the book.

I really enjoyed this book. If you don't like drugs, the sex industry, or cussing - I wouldn't recommend it - it's not your thing. But if you enjoy a story about a girl who pulls herself up and stays authentic to who she is, then this is a good one.

Book 2: Pretty

Same author, fiction. This main character is named Bebe (Beth) and she is an exotic dancer. One night, something tragic happens to her and her boyfriend, and her life is forever changed.

Most of the story is set in the rehab house called Serenity where she is staying to get clean. But the vivid description of the other girls in the house and the cosmetology school where she's working to get her license are descriptive and draw you in to the story.

Sometimes, I feel when things go wrong, they go really wrong for a while. And it feels like maybe it will never be right again. In this story, you can see the wrong happening, one thing after another, and some of it is Bebe's fault (she had control over it) and some of it isn't. I feel like it's the human condition to constantly keep fighting to stay above water and this book is about one of those swims.

So I hope those two books may bring some reading pleasure to anyone enjoying time off over the holiday. You can hear both of Lauren's Moth pod-casts here (the one for her son's adoption and the one discussing her trip to Borneo), and her website is www.jillianlauren.com.

Let me know if you decide to read these (I got them from Overdrive so I was able to check them out at my library free of charge), and what your thoughts are!

Happy Reading,
-H

Book news & other things

So much for my aspirations of writing weekly in a blog. How do people manage this? It's challenging to discern what readers actually want to hear from me (I'm not even certain if anyone is reading this). So, I suppose I'll approach it more as a diary than anything else.

A couple of weeks ago, a publisher contacted me expressing interest in my book. It wasn't entirely unexpected. I had reached a point in my life where I pondered, "What am I going to do with myself?" and found myself directionless. Prior to and somewhat during COVID-19, I had been querying agents about the book, with a few requesting the full manuscript, but nothing materialized. Life intervened, as it does, and I took a step back.

As some of you may be aware, I was a foster parent for about a year and a half, and my life wasn't my own during that time. I had dedicated myself entirely to caring for two young children. They have since returned to their parents, leaving me once again uncertain about my path in life.

So, as a last resort, I decided to submit my manuscript directly to a publisher instead of through an agent. The publisher had been recommended to me by an editor who had reviewed my manuscript before submission.

I thought to myself, "If this doesn't work—if they don't want it—then it's back to the drawing board, and I'll have to figure out my future in another way." So, I sent it off and received a response. Here's a snippet from John, the publisher, after he read my manuscript:

"Let me extend a warm welcome back. Welcome back from the edge, from the dungeons. I'm proud of you for getting clean and for writing this book. The most exciting aspect, I believe, is how you can use the book to reach and help young women going through similar experiences."

After several discussions, a Zoom call, and negotiations, my story has found a home with Koehler Books/Koehler Studios, and I couldn't be happier.

Naturally, I had to celebrate. Last weekend, my sister and I headed to Ann Arbor to take senior photos of my nephew. We took them at the Matthaei Botanical Gardens on N Dixboro Road in Ann Arbor. It is a very calming place - and super warm in there despite the cold weather. I may want to go back when it's nice outside to see the outdoor part. 

We ended up spending the night with my youngest daughter at her place while she's in grad school at U of M. 

We went out to dinner at Mani Osteria (pretty decent food - I guess they have great pizza) and the bar (a place in a downstairs part of a building called LoFi) and let me tell you—I can't hang like I used to. I also lost my "Michigan Mom" sweatshirt there. :(

Anyway, I'm working on a new website, so stay tuned for that. And there's more news to come from the book front as we progress toward the publication date of December 10, 2024. 

Until next time!

-H